The Weekend That Finally Happened

As you may have heard or realized by this point, my trip that I mentioned in my last post didn't happen that weekend. As a hurricane was approaching us, my return flight was cancelled and I would have been rather stranded if I had gone on my trip. That being said, I did actually reschedule my trip and went to visit my friend this last weekend. Much insanity occurred, though I never did get around to blogging while drunk, which was something both my friend and myself were completely open to doing.

Anyways, to get the logistics out of the way, I went late on Thursday night to visit my friend, and I returned home on Monday night. Some of you may take a second to realize that this means I am blogging about my escapades a good four days after they were completed. Though I had all intent to blog about said adventures as soon as I got home, my sleep schedule has been shot and I've been exhausted. However, I have learned rather quickly through my other posts that the longer I wait to write about an adventure, the more mediocre my post about it becomes so I am making sure to post about this sooner rather than later. If I were to wait longer to make this post, my post quality will diminish to the point where you might think I'm drunk blogging after all.

If I weren't lazy, I would follow this up with personally created formula
depicting the relationship between post time and post quality,
but since I am indeed lazy, here's a picture of a bear with a leaf on its head.

Anyways, my adventures started normally enough. Flights, taxis, sleep. Normal human functions. However, by midday Friday was where things started to take a turn for the more interesting. Firstly, my friend and I decided to go to the supermarket to stock up on some supplies. It was in doing this that we came across something I have never quite seen before.

The thing we saw somehow managed to take every facet of college life and shove it into one box. One medium sized box, completely affordable on a college student's budget. This box alone was enough to channel the inner college student within us both, as we dropped to our knees and cried tears of joy.

Isn't it... beautiful?

As we purchased this box, and a number of other, less necessary, groceries, we moved onward to the liquor store. The liquor store brought my friend a certain glee as she noticed that they carried her favorite vodka. More specifically, this vodka:

I can never look at normal cake the same way again

I had only learned of this vodka earlier in the day when she kindly introduced me to it in her apartment. The vodka not only smelled strongly of cake, but tasted of it as well. It was as if someone drunkenly took a bottle of vodka and smushed multiple cupcakes into the opening of it, letting the crumbs fall into the vodka and dissolve as they gleefully accepted their new life as a delicious cupcake and vodka combination.

From the liquor store, we went back to my friend's apartment to prepare for dinner, a trip to the mall, and a visit from her insanity ridden friend, who we will henceforth refer to as "the crazy woman", but only for this post, as she will then track me down and kill me after she reads it.

Upon returning to her apartment, we started playing some Katamari Damacy and cooking some chicken. Firstly, something must be said about Katamari. When we last hung out, me and my friend quickly learned that Katamari is the perfect game to play when drunk. There's something about the simplicity of the controls, yet the urge to do better and better each time you play. There's something about rolling up random people an things, even if they run and scream in the process.

Roll up ALL the objects!

Our adventures with Katamari and cooking continued peacefully until it was time for her friend, the crazy woman, to arrive. Before we knew it, the front door flew open, and she looked around, than at the two of us. "Geez, woman, this place is a mess." She bellowed. It was with those words that I knew quite quickly that it was not merely my friend's friend who had shown up, but it was indeed her mother and master as well. Where as I may have acknowledged in my mind that the room was a mess, I chalked it up as a necessity of college life and didn't say anything about it. It was soon after that the crazy woman held her hand out to me to shake, and upon shaking her hand I then caught her glance. It was then that I realized that this was merely the start of a story of domination and lust. This woman was going to whip both my friend and myself into shape, and she was going to make sure we liked it.

As I'm exhausted, and my post has dragged on a little, I'm going to stop this post here, but certainly expect some more updates about that weekend and life in general before the next few days are up. For those who are curious of what happened next, just realize that I am still alive and typing (for now) so obviously I did come out of my experience alive, though I may be slightly inside.